The new face of Viagra

President Barack Obama has a very hard job. Not only as president, but as the face of illegal Viagra in Pakistan.

Because some people think sex is all about power, and nothing says power like the face of the President of the most powerful country in the world dressed like James Bond.

Obama’s face is plastered on packets of “little blue pills,” a drug that is technically outlawed in Pakistan.

The pills are being smuggled into Peshawar, the hardline capital of Pakistan’s Pashtun region, from neighboring Afghanistan.

Sales are reportedly exploding (there’s a pun in here somewhere) as desperate men are willing to break the law to improve their sexual prowess.

And at just a dollar for four tablets, the market for the contraband meds is booming. But not without serious consequences.

While some of the pills that are smuggled through Afghanistan are pharmaceutical copies, others are made of completely unknown chemicals that have disastrous side effects.

Let your imagination run wild for a second…

You’re gross. Now back to the story:

“People use it here in Pakistan because, the pills do several things. They help anyone who is unable to have sex and improve the duration for those who have ruined their youth through masturbation,” Ehasn Ullah, a local shop-keeper, told the AFP.

Obviously, Pakistani authorities hate the pills as they encourage sinful sex while simultaneously suggesting that Obama is a savior of Middle Eastern manhood.